fancy girdles and biblical women | these tea-stained pages
Published over 1 year ago • 4 min read
Over the course of January and February, and the first few days in March, I did a deep dive into Proverbs 31. I’ve avoided doing any kind of study on it for a while now, and I don’t really know why. I guess it feels so controversial, being about gender roles, or simply so trite. After all, somewhere along the way, we reduced Proverbs 31 to tote bags and MLM schemes.
That’s a fair turnoff, in my opinion.
So when I finally made up my mind to just dig into it, I used Proverbs 31 as kind of a launching point into the rest of the Bible and what it has to say about biblical womanhood. I call it a whole-Bible study, in that I encompassed passages from the whole Bible instead of taking this one passage out of its full context and trying to extract some nugget of wisdom from that. (Granted, wisdom nugget extraction isn’t all that hard when it comes to Proverbs.)
Even still, I went into with my own goals and ideas. I wanted to form some kind of actionable, applicable checklist. I wanted to figure out how to apply buying land and sewing girdles into modern/universal terms. Let’s make it attainable for any woman, right?
Wrong. First of all, I leave this scripture with more mystery. This isn’t just to-do lists. It quite honestly isn’t attainable. It is 100% God, totally spiritual.
Proverbs 31 is deeper than we first thought.
Or, I should say, it’s as deep as we once thought before, but in the last few decades, we’ve boiled it down to nothing. Maybe we’ve tried so hard to make it attainable that we’ve stripped it of its excellence.
Old-school commentators actually applied Proverbs 31 to the Church as a whole. They saw something deeper laid out in these teachings, something that isn’t contained by location or occupation but is the culmination of millions of women and men living in a way worthy of being Christ’s excellent wife.
I can’t necessarily say that’s what the author had in mind when he first wrote it, or that’s what was intended by the folks who first compiled all these proverbs and teachings.
But I do know that whatever the point was, we’ve pretty much missed it.
Like many of the Bible’s most controversial or misunderstood passages, Proverbs 31 actually speaks to something more than we can see on the surface. The Proverbs 31 woman’s lauded excellence is not derived from the things she does (e.g., buying fields, feeding her family, getting up before the crack of dawn). There are a great many women who do these things and would never be mentioned in the same sentence as “excellent.” Rather, these actions symbolize her deeper spiritual qualities and are an outpouring of her inner excellence.
The Proverbs 31 woman isn’t just a seamstress. She’s skillful and talented. She isn’t just rich. She’s hardworking and a good steward of her resources. She isn’t just a homemaker. She’s a provider and cultivator of beauty who gives of herself for her family.
She doesn’t just work. She gives. She doesn’t just make. She teaches. She’s not just busy. She’s strong, dignified, fearless, kind, pure, humble, faithful, self-sacrificing, and trusts in the Lord.
All the excellence she can claim comes from her fear of the Lord (Proverbs 31:30).
So, no, it’s not attainable. And before you breathe a sigh of relief because dadgum, she sounds perfect, let me finish. This level of excellence is not attainable in our own strength. It’s God-given, but cultivated and stewarded by us.
What you can be relieved about is that we’re not expected to be this woman immediately upon accepting Christ—just like how we shouldn’t expected a man to be the wise man or just ruler featured in the rest of Proverbs as soon as he says “amen” to the sinner’s prayer.
The whole of Proverbs is a detailed picture of the sanctification process, of the lifelong work of Wisdom in our hearts and lives. It’s a journey that starts from within, from surrender to the Holy Spirit.
The truth is, there’s no modern equivalent to making fancy girdles (31:24)*. That fancy girdle making was already symbolic of how the woman who’s totally devoted to God puts her whole heart into everything she creates. She cultivates beauty and strives for excellence in all she does, whether she’s making clothes or music or sandwiches or decorating her house or starting a business. Most importantly, she puts the same effort and time toward cultivate a beautiful, bountiful spiritual life. She stewards her time and work for the Lord. She puts her hope and trust in Him. She fears Him rather than the world.
That is a biblical woman. Not one who restructures her life until it fits perfectly in 10th century BC Israel (although that would technically be a biblical woman). But one who restructures her heart to allow God to work in and through her, no matter what her life looks like.
*This is not to say that making fancy girdles isn’t cool. Or that there wasn’t a really excellent woman who made fancy girdles and also happened to be buds with Lemuel’s mom. Or that Lemuel’s mom didn’t make fancy girdles herself. By all means, make fancy girdles.
And, yes, I was aware this is women's history month, hence why I decided not to procrastinate on sharing these thoughts. Perhaps not the most empowering post you'll read this month, but that's what you can expect from me.
What do you take away from Proverbs 31:10-31? Are there any preconceived notions you've held about the passage, or even about biblical womanhood as a whole?
What have you been reading or studying lately? Are you like me and avoid certain books or passages? (If so, which ones and why??)
I hope y'all have a lovely Lenten season! Don't forget to savor spring. Go to the farmer's market, pick some wildflowers, make a cup of floral tea, go for a picnic, plant some flowers or veggies or herbs, go for a walk barefooted, drive with the windows down. Try slowing down a little...play a record or CD instead of Spotify. Take the backroads or the scenic route. Read a book instead of listening to it or scrolling. Bake muffins or bread from scratch instead of reaching for the cookie jar.
And maybe start incorporating a biblical habit too, like mushing grapes with your feet.
